And another weekend in the books

Today was raining, stormy day and it also brought on the feelings that I normally have this time of year. It is like clockwork. I suffer from depression but during the fall it only seems to intensify and today was one of those intense days. I thought about a lot of things today. Everything from my job, politics, family, or the lack thereof, money, loneliness, missing my other something terrible and being 45. Of course I am not going to go over each one. I don't have that much patience to type all that out and for it make sense.…

Another Weekend

Well, well, well, here we are. We made it to another weekend. I got up a little later than I normally do but I needed the little extra sleep. When I finally got up I took my blood pressure pills and insulin. I made some breakfast and watched The Family Feud with the original host Richard Dawson which had recorded the night before. Then I finally decided to go and get my hair cut. This was the first hair cut I had in, oh, let's say 8 months. My head feels a little lighter. Right after haircut, I came home…

Somewhat of a Wasted Weekend

Let me start out by saying you really do not know how truly alone in this world you are until your birthday comes along and goes right by. No phones call from anyone. No text messages from anyone. I take that back, I did get two text messages from co-workers telling me Happy Birthday and that made me feel a little better. But still there is nothing like getting two hundred Facebook messages out of five thousand "friends". They are literally people have never met and probably never will meet. A few out of that bunch were from co-workers of…

Life Doesn’t Hold the Same Meaning

Tomorrow I will have my 45th birthday. Alone, single and few "friends". Not to say I don't have friends but very, very few close friends. I will celebrate tomorrow alone. Wait... I won't celebrate. I will end up watching Buzzr TV all day and watching all the old game shows that I like. It's really not the same without my Mom. Hell, even if she were still here it would mean nothing. I see all these other people who's friends do things for them on birthday on Facebook. Some people have fun parties or go out, or whatever. I'll get…